- A new book gives hope to all older men
- What happens as the hair turns grey and the tummy heads south?
- Know your body gentlemen – help is at hand if you need it
You may have seen a piece in the Times which started…
…“With his muscles bounding joyfully into fat and his figure on the dancefloor resembling a broken clothesline flapping in a storm, the middle aged father gets a bad press.”
I began to think I had been spied upon!
But actually the story was about a new book written by a Yale University professor who claims that older fathers may be less toned and physically fit but are longer lived and better thought of by life partners…
…Or as the headlines shouted “Pudgy older fathers live longer and are more attractive.”
The stories were captioned by the exploits in fatherhood of aged rockers like Rod Stewart (66 when his last child was born) and Ronnie Wood (68 for his new addition) who apparently show how this story can be true.
Now I would question whether a similar image of my good self after the age of 60 having sired a new baby, would attract the same attention? I would fit the criteria of being built for comfort rather than speed but would I really class as attractive?
It reminds me of the question posed to Debbie McGee – “What was it that attracted you to the millionaire Paul Daniels?”. I can’t help thinking that the likes of Clint Eastwood, Robert DeNiro and Charlie Chaplin had something more than their looks that made them a good catch.
But why spoil the paper’s fun, and more importantly why ignore something that we chaps should all be thinking about – the ageing male body.
Both males and females look forward to the ageing process with trepidation and many commentators only seem to tell the bad news, but there are positives to look forward to as well – even if you are not planning a new baby in your retirement years!
What does old age have in store for us?
It has always seemed remarkable to me that males can continue to father children into great age – the Guinness Book of World Records lists a 92-year old Australian as its record breaker, but some sources claim a 96-year old Indian farmer as the oldest.
By comparison the oldest mother was 70, but had been receiving IVF treatment in order to conceive.
From a genetic point of view it would seem likely that birth defects would be more common as the parents aged so that a sensible period of fertility should be bred into us.
In my case the urge to procreate would be limited by the stress and hassle of having babies and young children to look after at a time when I would want to take things at a more leisurely pace – should grandchildren come along then that would be different as they can always be given back to their parents!
For the mother, the physical strains of carrying the baby and then giving birth must also be factored in and a younger body should be better able to cope.
The older celebrity fathers named in the news stories all had much younger wives who no doubt would have relieved the frail old actors and pop stars of their need to be up at all hours feeding and changing nappies.
So for some the joys of continued fertility are something to look forward to but for all of us there are some delights of later life that we should all enjoy.
First is an immune system which has pretty much encountered all that it can and thus protects us better than it could in our teenage years – believe it or not the statistics say older folk have fewer colds!
Likewise the chances of developing or maintaining allergic reactions are less with age.
But perhaps the best news we can console ourselves with is that we are measurably smarter with age. Now you may doubt that if you are confronted with a new piece of technology but the benefits of all of your accumulated experiences and learning does make you smarter.
But whether you happen to be a millionaire or a pauper the effects of ageing are going to catch up with you.
Some of them are annoying such as hair falling off your head but sprouting out of your nose and ears, but others are much more serious.
The most significant fact is that men tend to live shorter lives than women – and that is no laughing matter.
The reasons why this is the case have been postulated and argued over for decades with the most likely cause being those that involve weaker immune systems and a failure to consult with doctors.
It is a strange thing that men are much less likely to consult a doctor than women, and if they do are rarely able to have an open and honest discussion with them. It has long been the case that most males will put up with a distressing symptom rather than go to the GP.
I must admit that I fall into that category and can often hear myself saying “well what’s the doctor going to do apart from write me a prescription for a drug I don’t need!”.
But dear friends we take this approach at our peril in some instances.
A time and a place
One of the other stories that caught my eye recently was that which said we were too quick to see the doctor and many illnesses could be dealt with by a pharmacist.
The point being that coughs and colds, minor cuts and abrasions and itchy rashes don’t need to be cluttering the domains of the overworked medics, and this makes sense to some extent.
However, some of the earliest signs and symptoms of major problems are not obvious and it takes a trained eye and ear to determine what the underlying problem is.
For instance breast cancer can be indicated by simple changes in the skin over the breast or orientation of the nipple, long before any lumps are felt.
Dry and itchy skin on the back and shoulders is a known early sign of diabetes as is sore and painful feet.
Who is to say that the pharmacist would have these conditions on their differential diagnosis flowcharts?
The ageing male body is also susceptible to changes within the prostate gland and potential cancers associated with it, yet the rates of diagnosis are constantly being hampered because men don’t present early enough.
The BBC produced a story saying that prostate awareness was dangerously low in British men] and that we should all know more about our bodies.
Getting old for men is often seen as a softer process than it is for women with the rigours of the menopause to go through, but as I’m sure our aged fathers will also find out, it is no fun for the chaps either!